Thursday, May 19, 2011

the final countdown

I've been avoiding grocery shopping since the weekend. As such, my meals have become more and more "creative" as I scavenge for food in my fridge and pantry. I figured my lack of food-buying motivation was a result of 1) not wanting too much food in the house before leaving for Europe, 2) wanting to eat what I have before I have to move, or 3) just being lazy. Realistically, it's probably number 3.

But just today the true reason occurred to me: The Rapture. Or Judgment Day. Or the apocalypse. Or whatever you want to call it.

The Rapture is to occur May 21, 2011. This Saturday. No need to buy food if I and all of the "elect people" are to be taken to heaven.

... if I am one of "them." 


Though, to be fair, if I am not one of the chosen 3%, then what's the point of buying food now if I'm just going to have to endure hell-on-Earth until the world ends?

(October 21, 2011 in case you were wondering.)

Update May 22, 2011: I'm still here. You? I should probably go buy food now...


  1. Though the rapture begins on Saturday, don't you think it would be nice to enjoy some Doritos or Twix bars or something till the final end?

  2. Fair point. By "buying food" I meant healthy, life-sustaining food as opposed meals consisting of popcorn, frozen meatballs, or peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Trust me, I'm getting my fair share of "junk/guilt" food at the moment.